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When ‘Culture Fit’ Is Just Code for Emotional Suppression

You got the job...yay Not just because of your experience, but because you were a “great culture fit.” 


At first, it sounds like a compliment. A gold star for being likeable. Easy to get along with. One of them. 


But over time, you start to realise what culture fit really means in some workplaces: 

Don’t challenge anything. Don’t make anyone uncomfortable. Don’t be too much. 

The Smile Tax 


Being a “good fit” often means performing emotional safety for others. You smile when you're tired. You nod when you're dismissed. You laugh at the jokes that you know subtly undermine you. 

People don’t talk about this tax, but it’s real, especially if you are neurodivergent, racialised, disabled, grieving, struggling with your mental health, or or who are more introspective or less outwardly expressive. 


A 2023 Deloitte survey found that 61% of employees feel they need to hide parts of their identity at work to fit in. That number rises for those from underrepresented backgrounds. 

When companies recruit for “fit,” they are often building environments where emotional suppression becomes part of the job description. 


The Cost of Emotional Uniformity 

Workplaces that prize fit over difference tend to reward sameness and silence. It is not enough to do your job, you need to make others feel comfortable while doing it. 

That often means:  – Don’t be too blunt  – Don’t show visible stress  – Don’t disagree unless you wrap it in a smile 

This creates a culture where those best at emotional masking rise faster, not necessarily those with the most skill, clarity, or integrity. 


The CIPD’s 2022 “Anxiety and Work” report found that 42% of employees felt unable to express their worries or concerns at work, citing fear of judgement or negative career impact.

Emotional containment becomes the cost of keeping your seat at the table. 

In 2021, tech company Basecamp made headlines when a third of its employees resigned within days of a major internal policy shift. 


Leadership had announced a ban on “societal and political discussions” at work, framing it as a move to reduce tension and improve focus. But many employees saw it differently: as a way to suppress difficult conversations, particularly those around race and inclusion. 

The policy came shortly after internal pushback on a list of “funny” customer names being circulated, names that included ethnic minorities and raised concerns about bias. When employees challenged the culture, the message became clear: don’t rock the boat. 

This isn’t a unique story. But it is a telling one. A company once praised for remote-first innovation became a textbook example of how enforcing ‘emotional comfort’ can backfire when it silences legitimate concerns. 

 

‘Fit’ as an Excuse for Exclusion 

Let’s be honest culture fit has often been used to justify biased hiring and exclusionary practices. 

The person who “wasn’t a fit” was often:  – Too outspoken  – Too quiet  – Too passionate  – Too unwilling to play the political game 

They didn’t mirror the dominant personality traits already in the room. They didn’t bend themselves into a familiar shape. 

And that made them other. 


Wellbeing Can’t Exist Where You Can’t Be Yourself 

You cannot be well in a workplace where you are rewarded for self-erasure. You cannot feel safe if your personality, identity, or communication style is quietly policed. 

So many workplace wellbeing efforts fail because they exist alongside this unspoken expectation.....We care about your wellbeing, as long as it looks and sounds exactly how we are used to seeing and hearing it. 


In Gallup’s 2024 State of the Global Workplace report, only 24% of employees strongly agreed that their employer cares about their wellbeing. That’s a significant drop from 2020, suggesting that many people are seeing through the performative side of workplace wellbeing. 


What Real Culture Health Looks Like 

Drop ‘culture fit’ and instead Aim for ‘culture add’. 

Build cultures that:  – Invite emotional honesty, even when even if it feels slightly uncomfortable initially  – Accept communication differences as normal, not problematic  – Make space for discomfort as part of growth  – Reward boundaries, not just agreeability 

Workplace wellbeing isn’t yoga at lunch. It is being able to show up fully human, and knowing your job does not depend on hiding parts of yourself to keep others comfortable. 

 

Final Thought 

If your workplace only welcomes the parts of you that don’t disrupt the status quo, it’s not a culture.  

It’s a costume party. 

 

Sources:  – Deloitte, 2023 Women @ Work: A Global Outlook  – CIPD, Anxiety and Work: The Business Costs and How to Tackle It, 2022  – Gallup, State of the Global Workplace Report, 2024  – The Verge, Basecamp's new policies cause internal uproar, 2021 

 

 

 
 
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